Now is a time of great growth, upheaval and social change. Never in history have we had so much personal freedom in relationship choices or access to potential partners via online.
However, with freedom comes responsibility – it doesn’t mean we are entitled to everything we want, and there are consequences to the way we treat people.
The long suppressed feminine energy is rising, and women are reclaiming personal and sexual power. They naturally evolve healthy boundaries and stop tolerating sexual entitlement and double standards. This is intensely threatening the patriarchy and the current dating scene reflects this.
It is the same for any spiritual growth process: stepping up a level results in boundary testing and resistance from others.
Being able to hide behind the anonymity of a phone or computer screen has made lot of really dysfunctional behaviour common: sexual harassment, passive aggression, body shaming or threats.
It is easy to slip into self doubt, particularly for sensitive souls, and to wonder what they are doing wrong. I have talked to many women over the years who have shut down, grown jaded and cynical, even given up on dating entirely.
In this dating climate, it’s important to see things as they are. By this I mean cultivate optimism, but keep your bullshit radar on. Having to filter toxic people is a given, but their behaviour isn’t personal.
Consciously envisage what you desire in partnership, and then make life choices that align with this. You have to walk your talk. Don’t self-sabotage and make exceptions because you really like someone, or they seemed so good at first.
The toxic masculine hides behind the facade of the nice guy who somehow always ends up with crazy women. When things don’t go their way they will project blame, create drama and pick fights. Reacting feeds the bond, and will leave women drained and keep then from moving on. (This is also why these guys have an uncanny knack for popping up just as you meet someone new. They pick up on losing that energy supply once your emotional energy is directed elsewhere). Rituals of release such as writing a letter and burning it, or cutting energy cords can help break the bond. I will go into these more in the next article.
What you feed energy to is what you will create more of. It it much harder to attract a truly evolved, trustworthy, devoted partner whilst caught in these dynamics. There are amazing men out there, but you have to make the right space in your life to find them.
You will end up with the person you think you deserve. Create your life with awareness.
© Embracing the Divine Sensual – The Body Sacred